Monday, October 19, 2009

Amen, Brother.

Everyone has probably already seen this, but I thought it was pretty funny.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

From Denney Crane's blog

And so true.

Liberal vs Conservative

If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one. If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy. A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life. If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a black man or Hispanic is conservative, they see themselves as independently successful. Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church. A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (unless it's a foreign religion, of course!)

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed. If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he's in labor; then sues.

If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will delete it because he's "offended". 

Thursday, October 15, 2009

...and on, and on, and on...

--My friend and I watched the runaway balloon live at work today until it landed. The best part? The goofy guy chasing after it trying to catch the huge thing as it landed.
--Was anyone else getting dizzy from the camera spinning in circles?
--My iMac has turned me into a computer snob, I feel like all PC's are inferior to my computer. HAHAHA!
--I'm still having Big Brother withdrawals, I got way too into that show this season. Survivor is O.K. But still...
--I can't wait to hang up Christmas lights on our house. I love Christmas, I'm kinda like Clark Griswold on steroids.
--I have a huge crack in my iPhone screen, too bad AppleCare protection plan I bought doesn't cover damage cause by concrete.
--I have to keep my hands in pockets at all times in Wal-Mart, just thinking about how many people have touched EVERYTHING in there grosses me out. They should just go around with a spray bottle of Purell all day.
--Ever watch a pregnant chick pass out while having blood drawn? I have, scary stuff.
--I remember one time in college we were standing in class watching a movie and Wendy started getting light headed and leaned over to me and said "I think I'm gonna..." and starts falling face first. So naturally, being the loving and caring boyfriend that I was, grabbed the first thing I could reach, the hood of her sweatshirt. Too bad it was a zip up and it unzipped causing her face to meet the door. Hard. Man, I've never been so scared in my life.
--GoodNight Folks.

Swish and spit

I will admit since finding out Wendy is pregnant I've pretty much become a certified germophobe, so I'll consider it my civic duty to pass along this email I received yesterday. It really makes a lot of sense, I had a scratchy throat yesterday and tried the salt water gargle, cleared it right up!

Please realize that this is not official advice!

H1N1, like other Influenza A viruses, only infects the upper respiratory tract and proliferates (only) there. The only portals of entry are the nostrils and mouth/throat. In a global epidemic of this nature, it's almost impossible not coming into contact with H1N1 in spite of all precautions. Contact with H1N1 is not so much of a problem as proliferation is.

While you are still healthy and not showing any symptoms of H1N1 infection, in order to prevent proliferation, aggravation of symptoms and development of secondary infections, some very simple steps - not fully highlighted in most official communications - can be practiced:

1. Frequent hand-washing (well highlighted in all official communications) .

2. "Hands-off-the- face" approach. Resist all temptations to touch any part of face (unless you want to eat, bathe or slap).

3. Gargle twice a day with warm salt water (use Listerine if you don't trust salt). H1N1 takes 2-3 days after initial infection in the throat/ nasal cavity to proliferate and show characteristic symptoms. Simple gargling prevents proliferation. In a way, gargling with salt water has the same effect on a healthy individual that Tamiflu has on an infected one. Don't underestimate this simple, inexpensive and powerful preventative method.

4. Similar to 3 above, clean your nostrils at least once every day with warm salt water. Not everybody may be good at Jala Neti or Sutra Neti (very good Yoga asanas to clean nasal cavities), but blowing the nose hard once a day and swabbing both nostrils with cotton buds dipped in warm salt water is very effective in bringing down viral population.

5. Boost your natural immunity with foods that are rich in Vitamin C (Amla and other citrus fruits). If you have to supplement with Vitamin C tablets, make sure that it also has Zinc to boost absorption.

6. Drink as much of warm liquids as you can. Drinking warm liquids has the same effect as gargling, but in the reverse direction. They wash off proliferating viruses from the throat into the stomach where they cannot survive, proliferate or do any harm.

All these are simple ways to prevent, within means of most households, and certainly much less painful than to wait in long queues outside public hospitals

Edit: Spell check wanted to change germophobe to homophobe. Te He He.

"Shut up! I'm better than you!"

This kid is a freakin' nuts. And it's great. This is my favorite one, search "Greatest Freak Out Ever" on YouTube for his other masterpieces.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Rambling on, and on, and on....

--In the infamous words of a very rude commenter over at The South 40, this will be a post where I "just yammer on for the sake of hearing myself talk."
--Geez, some people. If your bored or don't like what your reading, JUST LEAVE. There is no reason to leave a snarky comment or report the blog. (i.e. Anonymous 8:04 to Denney Crane)
--Two things the blogging community needs back: Jarhead and Anobiter.
--We went to the Bridgeport Police town hall window peeper meeting last night that was practically in our front yard. They said they were stepping up patrols in the area. And that's pretty much it. Well I feel safe now. THIS is a prime example of why citizens need guns.
--Sitting in the waiting room of the ObGyn or baby doctor, or whatever the heck its called, felt exactly like the scene in Knocked Up.
--I watched Top Gun for the first time in a long time the other day. What a corny, awesome movie.
--Every time i tread to read a blogs comments on my iPhone and it opens a separate window, my phone locks down and I have to reboot it. Crazy.
--2012 looks awesome in a gay, retarded kind of way. Do you think John Cusack's character will go out wearing a trench coat and holding a boom box over his head in the final scene of death and destruction?
--I actually really want to go see Where The Wild Things Are, loved the story when I was little. Same goes for Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs.
--I'm a caveman when it comes to Facebook, its like rocket science to me.
--Twitter is awesome though.
--I didn't get a picture of it, but in today's All Around Wise I saw an ad for a home builder that read "You Deserve a Real Home" and had a big red X over a mobile home. Wow, that could probably be a little more PC.
--Like I said, just to hear myself talk.

I'ma be a baby daddy!

About two weeks and five different pregnancy tests ago we found out
that were expecting our first baby. Right now I'm about 99% excited
and 1% scared TO DEATH, or maybe it's the other way around. Either way
this is going to be an awesome journey.

Out first doctor appointment was this past Monday, they said she was
about four weeks along, a little less than we thought. Because she was
so early we didn't get a due date, but I will try to update this blog
a little more often now that I've actually got something to write about!